In My Opinion...
Or It Came From Beyond
And other nonsense

All reviews are subject to my freakish whim, and if you don't like it... Submit one yourself. I just might print it. I may wish to point out at this moment that I, Dr. Neon, am a mad scientist and as such, am a significantly more intelligent and enlightened being. Therefore, in your humble eyes, my opinions and reviews as such, should appear Godlike in nature. Thus negating your need to append or criticize my reviews. But, if you must, submit all entries to [email protected].

Cannibal! The Musical
I was actually appalled to find myself on a Saturday morning watching a movie called Cannibal! The Musical. For nearly two hours I sat munching popcorn, laughing at one of the strangest films I have ever seen. Worst of all I even sat through the credits! Mind you, the only thing funny about the credits is seeing Trey Parker's (Writer, Director, Producer, Star) name appear 22 times; but after the credits finish, the disclaimer appears telling you small children shouldn't have viewed this film. It then struck me that I was at home and I still sat thru the credits!? At least I only paid 4 bucks for this. I probably shouldn't have paid at all. It is a little violent, but in a weird way.

Dr. Neon's Grade: B-

Robot Ninja
It was on a cold and dark night when I and some friends actually rented this gem. What makes this video special is shoot location - Akron, Ohio (my home town), it is out of print now ( it is the only video not being re-released by Tempe Ent.), and a special appearance by Burt Ward! Gratuitous and graphic violence. Above par special effects considering budget (I knew some of the special effects crew on a side note), but not much as far as acting. Buut, what do you expect all things considered.

DR. Neon's Grade: C+

Ed Wood's Orgy of the Dead
Don't be getting those hopes up now! Despite the title, this movie is not a B-Rated porno ( those are bad enough). Written by Ed Wood, this is about the tragic story of two young lovers, lost in the California wilderness. Unfortunately for them, that wilderness is populated by Criswell, Evil Lounge Lizard of Darkness. With bad toupé and worse acting, he tortures the Damned by making them dance for him. This flick is timed at over 80 minutes, to which only 15 is devoted to dialoge. The rest of the movie is Holly'wood' wannabe's shakin it bare breasted. Not for the kiddies or anyone with an IQ over 12.

Dr. Neon's Grade: D

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